Dogs and cats, living together …

4 Jan

I have a puppy. His name is Baxter. Here he is guarding some turtles (Dirk Diggler and Linda Lovelace are their names):

Baxter is a very smart and loyal little guy, but he’s mostly (apparently) Jack Russell. Oops. Not such a good choice for a family with no fenced yard. That is to say that Mommie has lost some meat from her bones running this dog around and around and around the neighborhood.

Also sharing our household is Petey, a cat:

Because I want to stay married, I’ll withhold the photos of Billy and Petey snuggled up on the bed. This happens daily. If Billy continues to stay thin and neat, his relationship with this cat is going to put him well over the 50 percent mark, if you know what I’m saying. (His vast porn collection, of course, is testament otherwise, but I digress).

So here’s the word ratio, or algebraic equation, or whatever the hell they call this on the ACT. I wasn’t, frankly, paying attention.

Baxter is to Bob as Petey is to Billy.

That is to say that I love my dog, and Billy loves his cat. As it just so happens, I, too, love Petey. She is a truly awesome cat. She’s sweet, purrs if you look at her, loves to cuddle up and watch TV or nap, but also loves to play — she even puts up with Baxter chasing her and trying to lick all the hair off her head.

But Billy? He’s not so in love with Baxter. I feel like if Baxter would shit in a box and purr instead of bark, he’d be golden. But until he can do that, he’s in for an uphill battle in getting Billy to love him. Not that Baxter doesn’t try. It’s like he senses Billy’s intense disinterest in him — like Billy is the quarterback and Baxter is the fat cheerleader who hopes if she just jumps high enough or splits wide enough, she’ll finally win his love. Except Baxter is neither fat, nor a cheerleader, and frankly I think it’s uncool to make fat jokes. Maybe Fantasy Cheerleader Transgendered Baxter has a thyroid disorder, OK?

And, to be totally honest, maybe Bob didn’t exact ASK Billy’s permission before finding a free puppy on Craigslist and bringing him home. Maybe she was so desperate to find her child a playmate/guardian that she didn’t really bother to fully discuss this with her life partner. So I’m just suggesting there’s a tiny bit of resentment on Billy’s part that Baxter is even in the house at all. Just on background. Billy has been kind, as he always is, but there’s just not a lot of love.

Anyway, over the break I talked Billy into taking a hike with me and Baxter at a lake near here. During that time, Baxter did the following:

  • Ran around like crazy
  • Kept pretty close to his people
  • Waded in a pond
  • Chased a terrified armadillo
  • Rolled in feces

I feel like we made some real progress with Billy and the first four items on the list. The fecal matter was somewhat off-putting, as we had to ride home with a creature that smelled like a slaughterhouse. However, since that day, when Billy got to see my little buddy in his true state (not crammed into a little house begging for attention) I feel like maybe he’s turned a corner into perhaps learning to really love the little guy.

I mean, I don’t expect to see them curled up in bed any time soon, but still …


One Response to “Dogs and cats, living together …”

  1. Jenny January 18, 2011 at 4:20 pm #

    Patrick didn’t love Dexter at first. But we’re there now. Once Dexter stopped pooping on the carpet, Patrick’s love grew exponentially.

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